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Real Madrid's Toni Kroos appeared on a podcast with his brother, Felix, who slammed FIFA's decision to award former Arsenal goalkeeper, Emi Martinez, the Best Goalkeeper gong, saying it was a . Some shocking goalkeeping by Hugo Lloris allowed the visitors to go ahead in just the 14th minute, with the recent World Cup runner up dropping a shot that was straight at him into the goal. "I'm going to give Mass at St. Francis church, about two miles down the road," replied the priest. to remove Granit Xhaka from the situation. It is one of football's immutable laws, to be ranked alongside Germans winning penalty shootouts at the very top of the list. Do that, and Arsenal fans won't even have to rely on Tottenham's annual failings to put a smile on their faces. ", The reporter asks: "Who do you support, then? Both cars (with football stickers on windows) are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. Whats the difference between The Emirates and a cactus?With the cactus, the pricks are on the outside. Johnny comes to the front of the class. Ive only had him for like 20 months.. A pause, and a smile. not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. "That's excellent! . Save the cups!" Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. "The other man was flabbergasted and said "how in the name of god do you know that? What two Tottenham players make a Liverpool goalie?Alli-Son Becker. Why do ducks fly over Emirates Stadium upside down? It said it was to weak. Arsenal fans still sing his name with pride and affection. The coach was upset so the Newspaper changed the headline to read"Arsenal to play with Dicks out" A record number of women attended the match. Why did Jos Mourinho got sacked by Spurs?He aint that special. Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito?A mosquito stops sucking. The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. A: Because the cup's always in Manchester! They decided not to press charges because it was 2 of one and half a score of the other. Then he hands the bottle to the Arsenal fan. Q. Twice. A: They can't string three "Ws" together. You have a gun with two bullets. Why dont they drink tea at White Hart Lane?Because all the cups are in Manchester. He rushes over, introduces himself and takes out his pad and pencil to start his story for the next edition. He has to wear a support Arsenal. ?A Space Invader.Jokes About ArsenalHow long has Tony Adams played for Arsenal?Donkeys years.Arsenal Football Club JokesHow many Arsenal players does it take to change a light bulb?Eleven - one to change it and ten to play the offside trap.Jokes About ArsenalHeard the one about David Seaman?He never keeps a clean sheet.Arsenal FC JokesWhen Gazza scored at Wembley, Seaman was all over the place.Arsenal FC JokesWhat's the difference between Paul Merson and the rest of the Arsenal team?One takes dope and the rest are dopes.Jokes About ArsenalWhat have Paul Merson and a can of Coca Cola got in common?Their both red and white and full of coke.Jokes ArsenalWhy is the pitch at Highbury so green?Because they keep putting lots of shit on it.Arsenal jokesHow come Arsenal fans don't fall asleep during a match?The smell of their ground keeps them awake.Arsenal JokesWhat's the highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Pro-plus (sleep repellant).Best Arsenal JokesWhat's the second highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Horlicks.Best Jokes About ArsenalWhat is the difference between Paul Merson and a former Arsenal player, surname George?One Charlie shoots, the other shoots Charlie.Arsenal JokesWhat is the difference between Jon Pertwee and Ray Parlour?Ray Parlour still looks like Worzel Gummidge.Arsenal FC JokesAt Highbury, what is the difference between the words 'disciplinary' and 'football'? See if this plane turns upside-down will we fall out?". After though, Mikel Arteta dragged them all away and got them instead to celebrate with the away fans, hilariously having to take extra care to remove Granit Xhaka from the situation. Entering your story is easy to do. Why should Spurs have some talks with Theresa May?They got out of Europe within 2 months. Entering your story is easy to do. TwiceFC Arsenal Funny JokesFire brigade phones Arsene Wenger in the early hours of Sunday morning "Mr Wenger sir, Highbury is on fire! The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. For example: Dallas is known for cowboys, San Francisco was the place for the miners, 49ers, to bring their gold and claims, Islignton was famous as being home of the Artillery Regiment, thus "Arsenal," Milwauke HAD brewing. not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. You have a gun with two bullets. A: People would pass up a pair of Spurs tickets. You can explore arsenal fifa reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Unleash your creativity & share you story! A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while! "He couldn't go to certain places for dinner or walk freely in London because of the anger of the Tottenham fans. You can ask questions concerning the past, present, or future, whatever you want to know, but you only get one question per person for the sake of time.The Manchester United supporter pushes the other two aside and exclaims, God! "Great idea" says the second cat "I support Hartlepool. Similar to Bananaman getting called up as an Avenger. The priest climbed into the passenger seat, and they continued down the road. Find your nearest supporters club. Why does Arsenal FC plant potatoes at the edge of the pitch?So they have something major to lift at the end of the season. Arsenal's crown in 2004. ?He kept throwing out the W's.Best Arsenal JokesWhat do you call a fly inside an Arsenal fans head ? Instagram - Facebook - YouTube@SoccerManiak801. Whether it's a Windows, Mac, iOS or Android operating system, you will still be able to bookmark this site. Have a funny joke on Arsenal? Click the button and find the first one on your computer. He then walked away from the body. View our online Press Pack. Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, symbol, blackandwhite, pix, etc. Why do ducks fly over White Hart Lane upside down? Arteta recently went mad at some referee decisions during the draw with Newcastle United and Keys used the Ramsdale incident as an excuse to bring up his favourite narrative, claiming the Spaniard's 'inflammatory behaviour' was to blame. Thinking quickly, his friend rips a plank of wood from a fence, forces it into the dog's collar and twists it, breaking the dog's neck. 679215 Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF. A: Nice tattoo Meanwhile Arsenal have scooped eight trophies in that time having won the FA Cup and Community Shield four times each. Santa: What do you want for Christmas?Arsenal fan: I want a dragon.Santa: Come on. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! I think I will just wait for the police"Jokes About ArsenalThere was a Spurs fan, a Gunner fan and Megan Fox sitting together in a carriage on a train. Click on the basket icon in the top right and if you don't have anything in there, the site will tell you that your basket is "as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet". There's nothing worth craping on! Q: Whats the difference between Arsenal F.C. Tottenham Jokes - Arsenal Fan Support Arsenal Fan Support Home Tottenham Insults for Arsenal Fans 1. ", Another messaged: "This is such a good marketing technique to get more clicks on their website. The bad news for Arsenal is that in much the same way as Tottenham's repetitious subordination to their rivals has become a punchline, Arsenal invite jokes of their own by being stuck in their own time loop of disappointment. "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" She asks Mary why she is a Liverpool supporter. He once saw Tyrone Mings at a petrol station in Bournemouth but felt far too short to ask for a photo. One week later the three were all killed in a car crash. (Whos there?)Emery. 'Story Jokes About ArsenalA Spurs fan, a Watford fan and a Gunners fan came across a nude, dead woman in the street. Their club had been formed in 1886 in Woolwich and we had first played them in 1887, leading 2-1 when the game was abandoned by the referee because of poor light. She replied "One of my friends said you are a Pedophile.". 0 Comments. The first cat says "as we live at the football stadium let's divide it by team. The Rivalry of Tottenham Hotspur - Arsenal. the other one wore no knickers and she supported Arsenal. Tottenham are simply incapable of finishing above their rivals; the football gods will not allow it. A: Because they never have any points. ", boasts the little girl. Arsenal have won 13 titles to Tottenham's two - the last of which was lifted in 1961. One turns to the other and says "Hey Arthur! They're both obsessed with Tottenham. The last title won on a Spurs ground? I hope you have enjoyed reading all of these Arsenal jokes as much as I have :DPlease feel free to read more about Arsenal FC from the links below Would you prefer to share this page with others by linking to it? I waited for Two hours in the cold.". "Oi," she says, "the bleedin' radio in this motor doesn't work! There were three football fans one each from the clubs Arsenal, Manchester City and Liverpool they were walking in the desert and found a dead camel. It said it was to weak. Two days on and it still doesn't seem real: the dreamlike final weekend of the season, which in its sweeping drama proved once again that Tottenham will manage to unearth increasingly amazing ways, performing bizarre acts of contortion, to finish below Arsenal in the Premier League table. Primary 58 Votes Ever since the Gunners made the move from south of the river to Islington in 1913, there's been needle between the red and white sides of north London. 49 Votes A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Shoot the Arsenal Fan. Q: What is the difference between Arsenal and a cup of tea? September 14, 2022, 6:44 pm What is Arsenal calling their gay team, added to promote equality?The official name will be Upthearsenal but fans are expected to call them by their nickname of The rear Gunners., What is Arsenals mascot Gunnersaurus saying?I survived extinction for this fucking shit., A man stopped another man in the street and said, Can you help me? The Gunners fan was thinking: 'That Spurs fan must have kissed Megan Fox who went to slap him, missed him and slapped me instead. A: The bucket. Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, symbol, blackandwhite, pix, etc. ", The boy interrupts: "But I'm not a Spurs fan. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. What do Arsenal and Tottenham fans have in common?Theyre both obsessed with Tottenham. Q: What's the difference between Tottenham supporters and mosquitoes? She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad. Whilst the away end was bouncing, one Arsenal fan was hiding in plain sight behind enemy lines, and went viral for showing off his Arsenal kit in the home end, without the steward noticing, as you can see in the video below. There's no way they can catch anything.. If you're searching for Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans topic, you have visit the ideal page. You wont get hit unless the bottles got your name on it., Thats just what Im worried about, said the fan,my names Johnny Walker.. It is not the first time that an Arsenal fan has gotten away with it too, with another supporter also going viral for doing similar in the away game against Chelsea. For further details of our complaints policy and to make a complaint please click this link: thesun.co.uk/editorial-complaints/, Tottenham were trolled by Arsenal for their lack of trophies on the Gunners' online store, Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO). Supporters Clubs. A: Shoot the Arsenal Fan. (Whos there?)Gunner. And he, too, sank into depression. ', Megan Fox was thinking: 'That Arsenal fan must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Spurs fan and got slapped for it.'. Three aged soccer fans enter a church. Like the massive whopper that he is, Richard Keys somehow managed to blame the incident on Mikel Arteta's actions on the touchline. Diego Maradona decides to come out of retirement and play for West Ham.He goes into the changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum. A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Champions League final on television. This site is an open community for users to share their favorite pics on the internet, all images or pictures in this website are for personal pix use only, it is stricly prohibited to use this images for commercial purposes, if you are the writer and find this images is shared without your permission, please kindly raise a DMCA report to Us. For example [my story] would show as my story on the Web page containing your story.TIP: Since most people scan Web pages, include your best thoughts in your first paragraph. For other inquiries, Contact Us. Whats a pirates favorite football club?Arrrrrrrsenal. SOL CAMPBELL has slammed Tottenham fans for the years of abuse aimed at him following his move to Arsenal.The Englishman made the move to Arsenal afte . Then guy from ARSEnal saysi'm not hungry. Student : Manchester United lost because their defenders were Young, Small and Blind, A woman was reading a newspaper one morning and said A her husband, I set my XBOX password to "Tottenhams Defense". A: Because they never have any points. 'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. ", Meanwhile one simply stated: "Quality from the Arsenal website.". Q: Why did god invent alcohol? A: People would pass up a pair of Arsenal tickets. "Yes" replies Lukas "you should have my details on your computer". It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. Spurs haven't won a trophy since beating Chelsea in the 2008 League Cup final. Suddenly, the driver saw a Tottenham supporter walking down the road, and he instinctively swerved as if to hit him. Why cant Tottenham open up a restaurant?Because they have no silverware. Why did Jesus join Arsenal?He wanted to join a team where everyone is called Gabriel. Here you'll find all collections you've created before. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. ", Another said: "The fact Arsenal have to put that on their website shows how threatened they are of us nowadays. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". One day while driving along, he saw a priest. Finally, things might be starting to turn our way! A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points. asks Emmanuel. A: Because all the cups are in Manchester. "Funniest Arsenal FC JokesOne day Tom Thumb, Snow White, and Quasimodo are sitting around talking. Twice. Have you all heard about the new Arsenal Bra?It has a whole lot of support but it doesnt have any cups. A: So Tottenham supporters can get laid too. All of the sudden Tom Thumb says, "You know, how do I know I'm the world's smallest man? Why do so many housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and then come second. Whats up? He asks. We know its important but its only Spurs. Because the fans started to make them up themselves. Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? Arsenal has been in the Champions League for 18 years straight and hasnt won it, what are they gonna miss?The anthem. 40 Lyktan 8 yr. ago Funny you say that. What should you do? Q: What's the difference between Arsenal supporters and mosquitoes? A: A good start! ?The accused.Best Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan with half a brain?Gifted.Jokes Arsenal Football ClubHow do the braincells of an Arsenal fan die?Alone.Jokes ArsenalHow do you make an Arsenal fan's eyes light up?Shine a torch in his ears.Funniest Arsenal JokesWhy should you not allow Arsenal fans a coffee break at work?Because it takes too long to retrain them.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call the Arsenal team standing ear to ear?A wind tunnel.Funny Arsenal jokesWhy did the Arsenal fan get sacked from the M & M factory ? it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks. Q: What's the difference between onions and an Arsenal supporter? Q: How do you casterate a Gunners supporter? Well, were having trouble getting motivated for this game. Would Any Arsenal Supporter Wear A Tottenham Shirt For Money? The incident came after Premier League leaders Arsenal put on a masterclass to overwhelm Tottenham and extend the gap at the top to eight points. A: The tea stays in the cup longer! I came up with this today at the grocery store, and I'm not a dad, so all you dads out there, here's one for your arsenal. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); "Well, My Dad and Mom are Liverpool supporters, and I'm a Liverpool fan, too!" What's the bad the news?" He wants us to win the European Trophy, the dogs owner replies.The pub owner then asked what the dog says when Tottenham wins an away European match, to which the man replied, I dont know. What trophy will Arsenal win this season?August invincibles. A former Arsenal academy star, Bennacer has the chance to gain some favourable points with his ex-north London side with a big performance against Tottenham in the Champions League, and. I know it's bad, but everyone deserves a good arsenal of dad jokes. Q: What team comes beatween your legs and your back? To see all content on The Sun, please use the Site Map. If you use a smartphone, you can also use the drawer menu of the browser you are using. And then a fan jumped over and gave me a little punch [sic] in the back. Godspeed. "Uh, the fire hasn't spread to the canteen yet, sir.". "Intelligence reports indicate that the latest additions to the Ukranian arsenal are damaged and outdated, and many won't pose any threat to us at all." ", "Nope", The copper replied, "I already know that under every Arsenal cap is a cunt!". 'Look at this, dear. Arsenal's highlight of an otherwise intermittently miserable season arrived on the final round of fixtures as they somehow secured their best Premier League finish in 11 years, just weeks after discontent aimed at manager Arsene Wenger and owner Stan Kroenke spilled over into planned protest in a home game against Norwich City. ", This satisfies the woman, who immediately gets back into the car and drives for home. "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." After Tom Thumb's conference, he came out smiling and said, "It's all right, I am the world's smallest man". "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" A: A wind tunnel. dropping a shot that was straight at him into the goal. Jessica Amlee The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. A booming voice welcomes them as they walk through the doors. Perhaps there is someone more beautiful than me!" An Arsenal fan is walking past White Hart Lane and sees three season tickets nailed to the wall. Funniest Arsenal JokesWhy do Arsenal men like smart women?Opposites attract.Jokes About Arsenal FCWhat do you say to an Arsenal fan with a job? Southampton v Leicester City live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match, Shaun Wright-Phillips thinks dad Ian Wright regrets that his sons didnt play for Arsenal, Erling Haaland's agent drops HUGE hint over future transfer: 'Real Madrid is a dreamland', Brighton v West Ham live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match, Arsenal v Bournemouth live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match. Lukas Podolski How did Harry Kane pay his tributes to the Queen?By giving 90 minutes of silence against Sporting CP. What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur supporter who scores high on IQ tests?A cheat. In such page, we additionally have number of images out there. Q: Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito? . Here you'll find all collections you've created before. Theyre shit and we cant be bothered.Maradona looks at them and says Well I know Im a bit fat and old, but I reckon I can beat them by myself, you lads go down the pub. So Maradona goes out to play Spurs by himself and the rest of the West Ham team go off for a few beers.After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. Whats the difference between Liz Truss and Tottenham Hotspur?Liz Truss has no sons. Q: What do you say to a Gunners supporter with a good looking bird on his arm? Quasimodo then said, 'How do I know I'm the world's ugliest person? 'The season's almost over!'. BETWEEN TOTTENHAM and ARSENAL FANS at NORTH LONDON DERBY Thogden 1.29M subscribers Join Subscribe 682K views 9 months ago Special atmosphere at North London Derby inside Tottenham stadium. Career Day The RnB singer has been a fan . A: arsenel. ARSENAL have sent social media into meltdown after brutally trolling Tottenham's 'empty trophy cabinet' on their official store website. Tottenham were riled at the actions of their bitter rivals and put out a statement in response. Arsenal fans love a dig at Tottenham so they'll be thrilled to know even the online store is getting in on the act. He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Gunners supporter." Great! Tottenham 0-2 Arsenal: Aaron Ramsdale attacked by fan after north London derby 15 January 2023 Premier League Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale was led away from the area after an. Watch Champions League Live Tottenham fan kicks Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale in back after drama-filled end to Premier League clash It took place behind the Gunners' goal when Ramsdale. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. by It was almost as though football was exercising its yin and yang, using divine intervention to restore balance in the universe by ensuring that Arsenal's primacy was to be protected. )Wenger you going to stop being so mediocre, Arsenal? However, the real challenge for Wenger in what could well be his last season in charge of Arsenal is to try and snap the team out of the feedback loop they have been stuck in for the second half of his reign. Ive let you down Ive let you down.Dont be stupid Diego, you got a draw against Spurs all by yourself. On that occasion, the fan lifted his phone in the air showing the Arsenal badge on his screen, before putting it away and sinking back into the Stamford Bridge seats. Here is an unforgettable collection of Arsenal jokes and banter, from their Champions League run to the mocking from nearby clubs like Liverpool and Tottenham. As the goals flew in for Arsenal at Emirates Stadium in their 4-0 win against Aston Villa, in Newcastle the opposite was being inflicted on Tottenham as they somehow slumped to a 5-1 deficit against a relegated team with 10 men. 1) I don't get religion, believing in someone that did great things thousands of years ago in the hope they may do it again A bit like. Your email address will not be published. I will eat the heart Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. A Liverpool fan liked to amuse himself by scaring every Hotspur supporter he saw strutting down the street in an obnoxious Tottenham jersey. Its a sour taste but Im sure well enjoy it when were back in the dressing room.". More likely, the mental wounds inflicted by losing the league from 2-0 up away to Chelsea, raw and on display as they conceded twice and resorted to a stunning array of fouls, kicks and one infamous eye-gouge, simply could not be healed. Not really knowing what a Tottenham Hotspur supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. Arsenal might be top of the Premier League by five points, and clear of local rivals Tottenham Hotspur by 11 points, but one fan still thinks the Spurs players are better. Q: How do you stop a Gunners supporter from beating his wife? Washington should change their name to "Senators," and Cleveland could become the "Steamers.". SOL CAMPBELL has slammed Tottenham fans for the years of abuse aimed at him following his move to Arsenal. Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. On the way, she says, "Classical". You tell it want kind of music you want to listen to, and it automatically changes. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of whiskey didn't break. Q: What do you call 100 Tottenham Hotspur supporters at the bottom of a cliff? An encyclopedia of football shirts and boots knowledge both past and present Mark has also been to the FA Cup and League Cup finals for FFT and has written pieces for the mag ranging on subjects from Bobby Robson's season at Barcelona to Robinho's career. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. The man pauses for a moment before exclaiming, God! When is Tottenham going to win a trophy? The two examples show that football fans are capable of behaving impeccably, because usually it's one or two morons ruining it for everyone else. England and Wales company registration number 2008885. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. "Hate Jokes ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit ? Understandably, Arsenal fans were quick to comment on the club's jibe as they revelled in the joke. Thank you for signing up to Four Four Two. Why should Arsenal FCs support staff be careful with Gabriel Jesus after New Year?Once he goes off, history tells us hell be out until Easter. He replied, "Arsenal to win the premiership. As a result of the followers began to make them up themselves. Knock, knock. Read ourTransfer News Live blogfor the very latest rumours, gossip and done deals, Moment Aston Villa's Leon Bailey inhales 'laughing gas' after all night party, Mason Greenwood's England future revealed after rejecting country switch, Nicky Butt quit Man Utd as he couldnt stand players beating him to team, Man Utd considering THREE options for Mason Greenwood if he stays at club, News Group Newspapers Limited in England No. Even though he was certain that he had missed the guy, he still heard a loud THUD. A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. Be realistic.Arsenal fan: Okay. The Arsenal fan asks, "Aren't you having any?". This Arsenal team is demonstrating dominance and superiority over their opponents. replies Arsene. He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Tottenham Hotspur supporter." "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help.